Konrad in Lincoln Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 This "not in the mood" business is REALLY starting to get old. :x Quote
Frank Hagan Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 Quick! You need something to sand. Jake, you have something needing sanding don't you? Quote
Stump Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 I have sanding, lots and lots of sanding...even more after today Quote
Greg Luckett Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 Ray, you are dead right. I have 5, ages from 25 to 8. We just call all of them BC, and now the grandkids are having that effect while visiting. Konrad, there is hope for you. Sometimes they help out the other way too, by watching over the younger siblings to give us some time to ourselves. You will learn to plan bettre for the big event.... A boat in a slip or anchored out on a bay or lake is great... Quote
capt jake Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 Quick! You need something to sand. Jake, you have something needing sanding don't you? Trust me, sanding won't help the mood! ;) Quote
Frank Hagan Posted October 24, 2004 Posted October 24, 2004 It gets better ... a lot better. Once the kids are in their teens, and your wife gets past the age of worrying about pregnancy, your relationship can get much better. Or worse, if you ignore it. I finally realized that the "relationship" thing wasn't going to come naturally to me. I think some people are wired for it, but I'm not. If things on the surface are fine, I'll go blindly along thinking things are fine. When all this time, to use an analogy, the keel bolts are rusting off. So, about 9 years ago, I asked the guy with the best marraige I knew. He gave me the best advice anyone ever gave me, and it included two things: women feel more amorous when they feel loved (whereas men feel more loved when they get sex), and women need to be touched 7 times each day. I knew the first part, but asked about the second. Exactly 7 times? The guy explained to me that touch communicated more than words (made sense) and that women feel mistreated when the only touch is sexual. I didn't realize that ... hey, any touch is good, right? Nope, it not only is irritating, but its viewed as selfish, boorish, piggish and a few other adjectives I can't remember. So, he said, count the number of times you touch her (it can still be affectionate, but not just a grab intended to initiate something). Men like me are goal-orientated, so if I don't set a goal, and a number, I will end up not doing it. You don't have to STOP touching after reaching the goal, but you don't have to keep counting either. Its made an incredible difference. Just don't count out loud. Quote
Fintan Murphy Posted November 15, 2004 Posted November 15, 2004 So' date=' about 9 years ago, I asked the guy with the best marraige I knew. He gave me the best advice anyone ever gave me, and it included two things: women feel more amorous when they feel loved (whereas men feel more loved when they get sex), and women need to be touched 7 times each day. Its made an incredible difference. Just don't count out loud.[/quote'] Hello all, it's been a while I know. I've been working 10+ hours a day in work, on an XP and W2k3 project, so internet time has been down to zero. Just thought I'd bring this tread back to the top and say that, after reading it I made a conscious effort to try it. And does it work! After the initial need to keep remembering, it starts to become instintive. A hand on the arm here, a stroke of the neck there. The difference is subtle, at least it is to this "insensitive as a bag of hammers" male, but noticable. Gentlemen, if you want to rejuvinate your marriage, give it a go. Just don't go too fast too soon, or she'll think you're having an affair. Quote
Frank Hagan Posted November 15, 2004 Posted November 15, 2004 So' date=' about 9 years ago, I asked the guy with the best marraige I knew. He gave me the best advice anyone ever gave me, and it included two things: women feel more amorous when they feel loved (whereas men feel more loved when they get sex), and women need to be touched 7 times each day. Its made an incredible difference. Just don't count out loud.[/quote'] Hello all, it's been a while I know. I've been working 10+ hours a day in work, on an XP and W2k3 project, so internet time has been down to zero. Just thought I'd bring this tread back to the top and say that, after reading it I made a conscious effort to try it. And does it work! After the initial need to keep remembering, it starts to become instintive. A hand on the arm here, a stroke of the neck there. The difference is subtle, at least it is to this "insensitive as a bag of hammers" male, but noticable. Gentlemen, if you want to rejuvinate your marriage, give it a go. Just don't go too fast too soon, or she'll think you're having an affair. Yep, it does work. And you're right about that last statement too ... I once bought her a present ... an angel figurine blowing a kiss ... before one of my business trips. I included a card and some mushy stuff in the card about the angel watching her while I'm gone (or something like that). Scared her to death. She thought I was leaving her or something. I decided there and then never to be "romantic" again! Actually, it was over the top for a guy that rarely does that kind of thing, and because of that it made her wonder what the heck was going on. I had always acted "rationally" before. Quote
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