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And the award for "Worst Husband of the Year" goes


Konrad in Lincoln

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It goes to ME! (Rounds of applause)

So Friday at work, I'm starting to get a sore throat. By the end of the day, it's really bad. I mean, like acid in my throat. Total agony to swallow at all. I went to the doc on Friday night, because it's really bad. Well, he says it's not Strep Throat, it's something worse , I don't remember what. He gives me a prescription for 850 Mg of Amoxocillin. Good anti's. Saturdy, I'm miserable the whole day. But today.....

I wake up, and I feel a little better. But see, I'm supposed to go with the whiff to her mom's house for Easter. What a pain.

So this morning, it's like this:

"Konrad, how you feeling? You want to get out of bed?"

"Uuunnghhh... can't talk... can't breathe..." (I weakly flailed my arms a little for added effect)

"Honey, you sound terrible. You just stay home today, I'll go to Omaha myself. You stay home and rest."

"Mmmf," I said, into my pillow, not moving.

So I lay there and pretend to be on my deathbed, in the bed. I hear her get all ready. Eventually she goes out to the garage, and I hear the Pathfinder start up, back out of the driveway, and then the garage door go back down.

I lay there for another 60 seconds, with one eye open, looking at the door... Sure enough, she's gone for good. I throw back the covers, and up I spring out of bed, reching for the phone...

"Hello?"

"Hey Tom! She's gone. Let's go to my parent's house and ride dirt bikes. They're gone in Denver visiting my sister."

"Sure!" says Tom. (He's always up for a ride)

So basically I played hookey, got out of going to the Outlaw's place for some stupid Easter dinner thingy, and went riding.

The question for you is:

1. Does this make me the "Worst husband of the year"?

2. Or does it make me the "Most enthusiastic and dedicated rider" who's willing to risk the wrath of a 6 month pregnant wife if she finds out?

Think carefully, this is a trick question.

Hint: A pregnant woman on a rampage is a very ugly thing. I mean, talk about a weapon of mass destruction, sheesh .

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